5 ideas to make the Coachella, Stagecoach capacity increases more fun

INDIO >> The Indio City Council has approved gradually increasing the capacity of the Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival and Stagecoach Country Music Festival. Goldenvoice will be able to add 26,000 people to the capacity of each Coachella weekend, bringing the total to 125,000, and 10,000 to Stagecoach, bringing the total to 85,000.

Since the festival site is also going to get bigger by 50 acres, here are five things I want to see with the expanded space and tens of thousands of new friends.

1. Add a Disneyland-style tram

By increasing attendance capacity for Coachella by 26 percent, and Stagecoach by 13 percent, it means thousands more cars that look just like yours in the dark.

Now, while Goldenvoice has added more lights and color-coded pathways to help you find your car, it’s time we had our own tram service to and from the parking lot like Disneyland. Instead of Disney characters, the markers can be previous acts.

Overheard in the future Coachella parking lot: “I KNOW I parked in 2007 Rage Against the Machine reunion, not in 1999 Rage Against the Machine!”

One other suggestion: Hire David Lee Roth as the tram driver, a la his video for “Califoia Girls.”

2. Give the festivals their own postmark and zip code

Once the capacity increase happens, there will be enough people at Coachella each weekend to make the festival the fourth most populated place in Riverside County--behind Riverside, Moreno Valley and Corona.

Stagecoach’s population will be larger than most of the incorporated cities in the county as well.

Disneyland can get its own postmark, so why not the Empire Polo Club? Perhaps the Coachella postmark can be an image of frequent attendee David Hasselhoff.

3. Host the Academy of Country Music Awards

The ACMs just happened at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas last weekend and so many Stagecoach performers have been honored over the years, why not move the whole shindig to the desert? Host Luke Bryan is one of this year’s headliners and Stagecoach won festival of the year.

4. Add tractor races to Stagecoach

If you’ve been to Stagecoach in recent years, you’ve seen the antique tractor display near the far Palomino stage. By the end of the first day, people are trying to climb on the tractors, ignoring the “Please don’t touch” signs, and by day two, the vehicles are cordoned off with caution tape.

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Why not embrace the tractors and use the expanded acreage for tractor races?

5. Expand the Sahara Tent to the size of an aircraft carrier

I’m pretty sure if Diplo and Skrillex wanted to land a jet in the current Sahara Tent, they could. But, with as popular as EDM is at Coachella, let’s make the Sahara Tent even bigger--the size of an aircraft carrier! Heck, could we somehow get an aircraft carrier out of the water and into the desert?